Dear Eric: I am 40 years old and I have a physical disability. I need a wheelchair fed to move -both outside and inside my apartment.
My tires were recently parked by a broken glass of a bottle thrown from a car on the sidewalk. It’s been a week since I was able to use my wheelchair and I have 20 more days before my new tires arrive.
I do not think it is reasonable that it is angry that someone’s junk made me spend $ 200 on spare tires.
My caregiver disagrees. He says it is my fault to continue and not turn around. He also said that I am excessively, when the maximum I did is complain -a little for an hour, maybe an hour and joke “who threw the bottle on the sidewalk owes me a $ 200 comment once.
Am i being too sensitive about it? I think being upset to spending $ 200, I don’t have to replace something necessary for my continued function inside and outside my apartment due to junk is understandable, but I would like to ask your thoughts on this subject to be safe.
– Tireda
Dear Tire’d: Let this be direct. Your caregiver, who understands the challenges that you face navigating a world that is often not welcoming, do you think you have no right to be worried about it?
The junk, especially the broken glass, is a problem for everyone and any of us could and should bother us to have to navigate a plastered sidewalk with stuck pieces, even if it did not cost $ 200 American or a temporary restriction on mobility.
What happened was not fair and had a greater impact on you than on someone who could only take a step to the side or crush the glass under a boot.
Your caregiver must acknowledge that some things in the world affect you differently. This is empathy. It does not need a first -hand experience to be empathetic, but in this case it must be able to see how difficult this battle has made your life.
I hope this is an isolated incident in your relationship and may be in favor of other ways. Because attention is more than physical assistance. It is also about being willing to say, “I see you. I listen to you. What you feel is valid.”
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas to Eric@askingic.com or PO Box 22474, Philadelphia, Pa 19110. Follow it on Instagram and register -in his weekly newsletter at Rerithomas.com.)
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