Dear Eric: I am a woman in the late 1940’s, juggling a multitude of responsibilities that have let me feel drained and overwhelmed. At work, I manage several teams and I am constantly making high pressure decisions. At home, I am a mother dedicated to a Tweenager; His father (my ex -husband) is rather deactivated, with a significant burden on the needs of our daughter. My current husband, although in favor, is wrapped in a controversial battle of custody, directing -to me towards emotional land. My older parents, though healthy, depend on daily reviews, which can be emotionally imposed. Even our pets seem to trust me for comfort.
The constant demand for emotional work has left me fatigue, irritability, headaches and frequent weeping spells.
I am looking for effective strategies to fill my energy and find moments of peace. I am grateful for my husband’s support and I am in medicine against anxiety through a psychiatrist I like. I also see an executive coach monthly. I have been looking for a therapist for years, but I have not found one that resonates with me. How can I navigate this complex network of responsibilities and recover my own well -being? Is it like a mid -life crisis?
—Emocionally exhausted
Dear exhausted: I write this with the maximum compassion: You are happening. Sorry and listen to you and I have a friendly breathing in the hope that you are also pausing, breathing and exhaling right now.
Although you get support, there is something so crucial to just recognizing it, your psychiatrist, a friend, the world, this is too much for the moment. Does not make you weak or fails. Sometimes it can only be a release valve: a way to describe the mountain you are trying to climb.
I want to firmly suggest a practice of awareness and meditation. Applications such as the calm and books such as “Mindfulness” by Dr. Danny Penman and “Mortal Meditations” by Oliver Burkeeman offer digestible entry points to recover even five minutes a day. A practice will do two things, at least. First, this is a message that this time is important to you and, by extension, it is important to you. With the energies that premiere in so many different directions, it can be easy for you to have little. Secondly, a practice will help to silence the mind not only while you meditate, but in the later hours. This allows you to navigate and through daily stressors.
Please continue talking to friends and loved ones about what’s going on. It is not a load to record -even if others cannot always help. This is a lot, but it is not forever.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas to Eric@askingic.com or PO Box 22474, Philadelphia, Pa 19110. Follow it on Instagram and register -in his weekly newsletter at Rerithomas.com.)
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