Dear Eric: My 40 -year -old friend moved away a few years ago. He is alone and helped in many ways with his move. I went to visit, called and kept in touch with the visits, driving two hours to see it.
He recently called me to explain -all the things he dislike about me, some very cruel things and they crushed me.
I told her I listen to you and I would keep my distance and let her go. To my surprise, he moved away, did not enter with me again and accepted the break.
I thought about trying to make it, but I feel so wounded and I really don’t want to be a friend with someone who would treat me like that.
He never seemed happy and is one of the people who have anger. I’m not like that. Maybe we turned away. Some thoughts of separation?
—An old friend
Dear friend: Although this friend treated you unfairly and was unnecessarily cruel, he did a good thing: he took out of your life. Forty years is a long time to be a friend with someone, so I understand the sorry you feel. But 40 years are also a long time to put yourself in mind with someone who is not happy. I wonder how many smaller lists or cruelts you had to deal with over the years.
Try to allow -you are space and time to cry this loss, while remembering -you deserve to be supported in the way you support friends. Going out of your former friend was more a reflection of the way you see the world than your place.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas to Eric@askingic.com or PO Box 22474, Philadelphia, Pa 19110. Follow it on Instagram and register -in his weekly newsletter at Rerithomas.com.)
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